I’ve questioned
I’ve wondered
I’ve cried
I’ve denied
I’ve moved
I’ve stayed
I’ve called
I’ve listened
And yet it’s in the stillness and silence that these days made sense
And yet it’s in the stillness and silence that I find some peace
There are moments of raw grief
There are episodes of emptiness
Maybe one day I’ll understand
Maybe I never will
Maybe I won’t need to understand
This isn’t only because of you my friend
This is about all those encounters with loss
The time spent wondering why
The only true response is there is no answer why
And all I am left with is “goodbye”
©Estelle Blake – 19th August 2015 (3rd edit.)